“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it.”  – Peter Pan

When I think back to my childhood, I remember laughing till my stomach hurt, playing for hours and hours on end, being ridiculously happy, and the biggest memory, having a wild imagination that took me into another world. And that was the best part of being a child. I remember playing jungle through our sumac trees in the backyard, pretending to be a mermaid in the bathtub water that I begged my Mom to put salt into, making up funky dances and routines on our trampoline, creating awesome forts out of boxes and blankets… all of these things, took a wild imagination. I had the whole world at my hands, I could think of anything, be anything, be anywhere, and it was thrilling to take my mind into another place, into an oblivion.

What happened to that? A child’s mind. So innocent. Nothing but playing on their simple minds.

I feel the tug of my imagination lately as Ivy wants to interact and play together. I certainly don’t have my imagination like I used to. I miss it. I wish I would have kept up my imagination and wander my mind into oblivion now and then. It was school, sports, work, career… your imagination sort of gets put on the back burner. Now, as Ivy plays and plays, I see her imagination emerging and it brings the kid life back a little bit. I see her playing in her princess gowns and fairy wings with a sparkle in her eye, and I see that spark in her change, like how I used to feel, that I could be anything. That I really was that princess or fairy, or whatever I wanted to be, and now witnessing Ivy do these things, I only want to foster that and help her imagination evolve. We are really into the books Pretend and Red Wagon, where she’s learning and understanding this imagination concept better as we “pretend” to be on a boat while we’re sailing on the coach, or when we “pretend” to be an airplane soaring through the sky. I want her to feel like a real kid who can be anything or do anything she puts her mind to.

But it’s hard. I struggle coming up with ideas, or how to act, or what to do when I see her imagination taking off. It’s like that part of me is gone. I don’t even know how to have an imagination anymore. It’s so basic as I try to play princesses with her. And I lose interest so quickly. Why is it boring for me to try to be a kid? I try to snap myself out of that immediately. (Cue – PUT PHONE AWAY music) There is hope though, I am really learning from Ivy. She now has the ideas of what to do, how to act, what to say, and we laugh and play together. She’s slowly bringing my imagination back as I am trying to foster hers. I believe I will have more of it back someday. Decades of years worth of making up to do. Things to erase from my mind of all the horror and stresses in this world. Time to just think like a kid again. Wouldn’t that be nice?

While I’m trying to work miracles with my mind going backwards 25 years, I’m going to google “fun imagination games” and go play with my children till this brain is erased of any of this mess of how to be a kid again. For goodness sakes, it’s basically just act as hysterically ridiculous as possible, right? Well that might be a good start. At least we’ll have some good laughs :)

Photos by Amie Hansen Photography

Do you remember the first lie you told? How old you were? I don’t either (thankfully), but I assume I was approaching my “difficult kiddie years.” I feel like it’s right around the corner for Ivy. She’s going to eventually learn that if I tell Mom this, I’m going to get in trouble and I don’t want to get into trouble, or I am going to lie because I don’t want to do something. It’s inevitable that someday (hopefully later, much much later), she will lie to me. And that already breaks my heart. Or worse, is she ever going to say “I hate you Mom.” OMG I can’t even THINK about that. I will probably die if she ever says that to me. 

The point is, is that, this age, two, is so innocent still. So sweet, so vulnerable, so loving, so carefree, that they don’t even know what a lie is. Can you imagine not knowing what a lie is? Or how to lie? We all need to channel our Jim Carrey selves for a minute and not lie. That would be a little scary! I might have someone telling me to get rid of that excess gut! ;) 

Anyways, I’ve been noticing Ivy’s innocence lately more and more now that Leo’s around. Or maybe because she’s getting older. Either or. But there have been a few instances that I have been like, if you were older, you so would have lied about that. And I hate thinking that! For example, I was in the kitchen cooking dinner and the kids were in the living room playing. All of a sudden, Leo let out a little scream, so I went and checked it out. Ivy was sitting there while Leo was now knocked over on his back lying there. Curiously, I asked Ivy, “Did Leo fall over or did you push him?” She responded, “I pushed him over with my foot and he falled over.” I chuckled, because of how specific it was, but explained to her to not push him over and yada yada. She just says, “Ok Mom.” All cute and stuff and probably not comprehending a single word I just said. Fast-forward another year or so, would she still tell the truth? So nervous about her first lie!! 

So I googled it. I found this article about the ages and stages of lying, and the fibs start happening as early as toddler age! While they’re pretty innocent little fibs, it starts that early! Yikes! I’m basically at the doorstep of the first fib. Deep breath. Wheeeew. I definitely want my children to be honest human beings. In fact, this article states that the most desirable character trait for children is HONESTY. It beat out self-esteem, kindness, good manners, and strong work ethic. That’s pretty awesome. Lead by example, parents! Indeed, honesty is the best policy, after all.

Meanwhile before I get a little heart-wrenched from that first fib, I’m just going to go ahead and soak in this innocence age, and enjoy that my little girl, is still really just that… a sweet little innocent girl ♡

Photography by Amie Hansen Photography

Sometimes as parents, we need an “ah-ha” moment to really check into this parent gig again. I get lost in being a parent occasionally. It’s so routine and boring sometimes. Wake up, breakfast, play, snack, play, lunch, nap, snack, play, dinner, play, bedtime. Can get a tad monotonous. Especially days when I’m not in the mood to play or do anything. It’s hard to act like a kid all day when you’re not really a kid. I can only play fairies and princesses so many times a  day : / And then there are those days where we get out and about to a fun place to get a change of pace and see new sights. I sometimes feel like I want to make someone else entertain my kids for a little while when we get out of the house. It is nice having so many opportunities around Sioux Falls to take the kids to. Get them to explore other areas of their brain and be inquisitive about the world around them rather than our basement playroom. Plus giving Mommy a little break from Barbies and play make-up. Works out for all of us.

Usually when we get out of the house and go somewhere, I let Ivy wander and explore herself as I sit back and take a little break while she entertains herself. However, back to that “ah-ha” moment I had. We were at Skyzone and I was letting Ivy just jump around, I had Leo in the Baby Bjorn carrier and we were kind of jumping around too, but basically just keeping an eye on Ivy, not really interacting too much. Well it was then that I saw Ivy stop and watch this Mom and her daughter.  The daughter would run down the long trampoline as the Mom held her arms out for the daughter to run into. The daughter would run run run as fast as she could and jump into the Mom’s arms. They did this again and again and the daughter was laughing hysterically and so happy and the Mom was getting a big huge hug out of it too. As I watched this, then looked down at Ivy, I could see that she wanted to do it too. And immediately, I felt so bad. Why didn’t I think of something so easy like that to play with my daughter? Here I was just jumping around letting the time pass and depending on Ivy to create her own fun, letting “someone else entertain my kid.” Then the embarrassed in me, didn’t want to sit down and do that right away because the Mom would know I was copying them. But good grief, who really cares, I’m at Skyzone for goodness sakes.

So I sat down at the other end of the long trampoline and she started running and running with her little pigeon toed feet as fast as she could and jumped into my happy extended arms to give me a huge hug. It was pretty much the best feeling ever. I was playing with my daughter. She ran back to do it again, and said, “again, again!” about ten more times. I felt so happy but so much like a fool at the same time. Here I was copying this other Mom when I went to Skyzone just to have “someone else entertain my child.” And that’s when I said “ah-ha.” I don’t ever want to feel that way again. Something so simple as running and jumping into arms can make a kid smile. Why wouldn’t I want that more? To offer Ivy a simple little interaction?

And now when I go places with her, that’s kind of our thing. Whenever I see an opportunity for her to “run run run Ivy!” I take advantage of it. She knows exactly what to do and she immediately smiles and laughs. I just die seeing her pigeon toes try to run as fast as she can with that big humongous grin on her happy face. It’s those moments that I want to have with her more and more. Sure I still need those breaks, when she can go play and explore on her own and learn independence, or hand her the ipad for a few minutes of quiet, so I can like, actually take a shower or something (humph), but a quick interception of fun interaction benefits us both. I don’t want to be a kid all day, but we like high morale around here. I need to take better advantage of the learning opportunities that exist out there (says the teacher in me). There’s so much to teach your child when you’re out and about!

I wish I could go tell that Mom that she inspired me and encouraged me to change the way I parent. Something so simple and stupid that made me go “ah-ha,” that’s the kind of parent I want to be. Someone who plays and laughs with their child. I need those little reminders sometimes when times are getting monotonous or when I want to browse on my phone to pass the time. That’s where I should really put it all down and tell Ivy to “run run run!” as fast as she can into my arms. Because let’s face it, she won’t be wanting to run those pigeon toes as fast as she can towards me for a hug forever. #siiiiiigh

Photo by Amie Hansen Photography